Just when you finally turned into a happier, better version of yourself, you get discouraged by other people’s reactions to your newfound perspective. Maybe they don’t like it. Maybe they don’t agree with anything you believe in. Although it is easy to shrug off others, what do we do when the people against our upgraded version are our loved ones?
Join me as we talk about how you can keep your head high even when others disagree with you. You don’t have to shove your beliefs to them, nor should you completely stay away! Find out how to find the balance of walking the walk without them at first, but with them when the time is right.
The New You Versus… Everyone?!
So you find comfort in your new belief after having brand new eyes. But those eyes also see that so many people are not on board with you! Worse, some of them can even sound like they are downright against you.
Maybe it’s easy to simply shake everybody’s opinions off, but how do we manage it when we’re talking about a disagreeing spouse, child, or bestfriend? Don’t worry, I found myself in that same position before, and it was not easy. Most people go through either compliance or defiance.
Compliance is when you simply forget your newfound perceptions and just go with what they believe is right. If everyone thinks you’re wrong, then you must be really wrong? This is a wrong turn, so please don’t choose this path. You will end up feeling resentful and haunted by “what if’s” in your whole life.
Defiance is when you persist in being right and you tend to make everybody wrong. “Why don’t you see things my way?” – this is a common line for those who are in the mode of constant defiance. It’s not a fun fight. It hurts you and it hurts everyone around you. No matter how your new truth resonates with your world, forcing it to others will never work. There is no use in not allowing them their choice of experience!
The key is to allow everybody to be on the journey that they are on. We all have different paths, different battles, different demons that we face. What works for you may not entirely work for them. We resonate differently to different things and that’s okay! Let others do it in their own path and at their own pace.
Your 3 Main Responsibilities To Yourself
First, it’s your responsibility to listen to yourself.
Second, it’s your responsibility to show up for yourself.
Third, it’s your responsibility to take a stand to what your truth is.
What do these three things tell us? It means that you do not need permission to be who you are. It’s important to have a voice, and to keep that voice used when the time calls for it.
At the same time, it is not your responsibility to make sure others are happy in their journey. Let them take the heartbreaks and successes in their own terms – there is no need to make sure your principles are injected to their perspectives.
Just Walk The Walk!
Don’t worry too much about people not accepting or agreeing with you at the moment. You never know if they are silently being influenced by your consistency or if your respectfulness has impressed them. I remember being ripped by my own husband sometimes about the sudden change in my perspective and language. I needed to give him that space, but that didn’t mean I would stop what I believed in!
And so one day, he started to say a sentence that made him sound like me. And immediately he followed it with, “Oh no, I’m starting to sound like you now!”
Did it offend me in any way? Absolutely not!
I took it as an assurance that as I was walking the walk, I was slowly imprinting my values towards the people around me in a really good way. They did not resent the new me, they did not come to dislike the new me even more. They ended up becoming it, even in the most little ways.
Know Your Audience
I don’t share what I learn to everyone I cross paths with. Energy work, possibilities, and everything in between that defines me so much – I only talk about this to a select few. It’s one thing to not resonate, but to completely disagree is another.
If someone might be way too off about my principles, I would not bother to even talk about it to them. It’s not my mission to convince them about every single thing that I believe in, and that’s true to you, too!
The key is to simply know your audience!
Bottom Line
Don’t cut yourself off from people who don’t agree with you. Don’t turn your back from your new perception and identity. The secret is to never get worked up on proving yourself to others and to know how to walk away from conversations that might end up as an argument.
Stay as that powerful example. There are people who want to join you immediately but don’t forget that there are also people who are bound to join you in time. That could be your own spouse, children, friend, or colleague.
When you continue to keep walking the walk even when you feel like you’re all alone, you will be surprised how you will be walking with so many loving people behind you in due time. So whether your new self is a “yay” or a “nay” among family and friends, just keep going because you never know who you’re already convincing!
Additional resources
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