I’ve gotten some great feedback and a lot of questions about the divine feminine on a daily basis. Most of the women ask, “How do I actually be the woman that I desire to be?” or “What do I do for that?”
This is really illustrative because although trying to learn how to be in the feminine energy, we instinctively tend to go into “how” and “doing,” which are masculine traits.
Let me be clear, I’m not judging – just pointing out that we’re, in a way, programmed to be in masculine energy all the time. But our goal is to lead with our feminine and use our masculine side as a support.
As I’ve repeated many times, striking the perfect balance between our two sides makes our experience better, more joyful, and more exciting and gives us much more power within ourselves. That’s why I’m going to review the characteristics of the divine feminine.
So, join me today as I’m talking about what I do to utilize my two favorite divine feminine traits.
Let’s dive in!
Different but Complementary
Whenever I talk about the divine feminine (or empowered feminine), I repeat this: neither women are entirely feminine, nor are men just completely masculine. Regardless of our gender, we have both feminine and masculine qualities.
Achieving the balance between the two energies would bring more fun to your life, and make you more productive, focused, and energized. If you are a woman, it’s ideal to spend about 70-80% of your time in the empowered feminine and allow masculine energy to support it.
That’s how God created men and women – to be different but complementary. Our brains are not wired in the same way, and we focus on different things. But that doesn’t mean anyone is better.
We earlier said that we show up in specific ways depending on whether we’re in divine/empowered feminine or masculine energy. (Check out this episode or pick up this reference guide to easily check which energy you’re more in.)
You have these two reminders, so I don’t need to go into details about all the feminine traits.
Try This On
If you’re an ambitious woman, you are probably used to being in masculine energy because that’s how we’re modeled. But there’s a better higher way to do it as women. So don’t look at your to-do list or think, There’s no way that I can do all of this!
Pick up one thing instead, and experiment with it. When I started using the language of I’m just going to try this on, I opened up to new possibilities. Finally, I could do and experience something different without the pressure to get it right, perfect, or even good.
Experimenting and trying to experience something new (yet another feminine trait – receiving) are particularly useful if you have trouble moving out of masculine energy. Then just try to give yourself a break. Feel some mercy, grace, and compassion for yourself, and let it be awkward before it’s elegant. It always feels uncomfortable at first, simply because you’re not used to it.
But, the more you practice, the faster you’ll get comfortable with it. You’ll turn on the light of femininity within you, and it will feel very refreshing to you. It might be foreign initially, but then it will become really, really refreshing. Just practice!
Connect to Flow
The easiest way to practice getting more into the divine feminine is to pick one characteristic to play with. I did that with my favorite ones: the flow and the pleasure.
The flow was much easier for me to connect to. I love to play with this feminine characteristic first thing in the morning. I want to connect with God, divinity, my higher power – whatever you find the most suitable.
In my own imagination, God is not someone who stresses out or is surprised by our choices or behavior here on Earth. I can’t think of Him as someone filled with resistance, anger, or revenge. God is pure love, and he wants us to feel joy and experience prosperity.
I believe that if God is nonresistant, then I can also be nonresistant. “Stop resisting” is what’s the flow all about. So I close my eyes, take a breath, and go into what flow feels like.
If I’m flowing through my day, it doesn’t mean making jerky movements or getting upset by interruptions. In those situations, I’m rather like, OK, I’m going to focus my attention over here for a little while. And once I’ve finished that, I can refocus the attention back here.
I imagine the flow as a winding river. It does not go to the left and then sharply to the right – it winds and curves, making us easier to get into the flow (as the curves belong to the feminine trait of circular – unlike men who are linear). When I start my day that way, it is so easy to stay in the flow.
Connect to Pleasure
Why was the flow easier for me to connect to than pleasure? It’s because I was raised with the we-work-first-and-then-we-play belief system. They also taught me that playing was wasting time.
But hello – the work is never done!
That’s why we usually get to play with so much guilt, shame, and judgment – our parents heaped it upon us, and now we’ve taken over that role, heaping the same thing upon ourselves. I know you can relate to this, as it is probably drilled into most of us.
However, when I allowed myself the possibility that the pleasure could actually be a tool to help me succeed without struggling my way to that next level of success, my whole life opened up in the most glorious ways.
As women, our bodies are designed to receive pleasure – that is such a characteristic of the divine feminine. It’s not about reason or practicality. Many times there’s nothing practical about pleasure.
But you can receive pleasure in so many different ways once you connect to your body and focus on what you like, what feels good, and savor that pleasure. I allow myself to experience pleasure through all of my senses.
I savor beautiful sceneries I see, perfumes and essential oils I love, music that inspires me, the moves of my body that I enjoy – all those things are very pleasurable. And there are a ton of really simple things I would do throughout my day to connect back with pleasure.
Allow Yourself to Play
After I learned how to connect to this divine characteristic, I’ve started expanding more into it, and now I can apply pleasure to work and pick up the things that feel most pleasurable. As I do that, many exciting things are happening.
I’ve felt lighter and become more focused and more energized. At the end of my workday, time seems to collapse or alter somehow. Ideas and solutions come without me trying to hammer them out but just relaxing into it.
I would encourage you to play with flow, pleasure, or any other characteristic of the divine feminine that pops out to you (the one you find the most fun to play with at first). Allow yourself to play – that would be the best way to invest your time (if you like to put it in these business terms).
If you can’t remember what the empowered feminine characteristics are, pick up your FREE Feminine and Masculine At-A-Glance reference guide, a quick reminder that will help you lead with your divine feminine.
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